‘Tis was a warm summer evening, not long before twilight (the time of day, not the movie) when I found myself in the automobile parking area, congregating with the young people whilst is satisfied my hunger with a meat sandwich, otherwise known as a burger. While there, I found myself talking to a young gentleman, who asked me about my swag. Horrified, I clutched my hands to my breast and exclaimed “Goodness young man! You cannot ask a lady such a question! Besides that is what underwire is for!”
I stood looking in the mirror this morning and I found another grey hair in the middle of my brown locks. It was depressing but it’s only part of the problem. As I looked harder I saw something else, I saw someone who had lost their identity during years of stress. I have lost what defines me as me. I didn’t have time to dwell on it, I threw a hat on and left the house to take the kiddies out for the day. While I had the three year old at the play area I saw other mums there who had their glad-rags on with a full face of make-up, and I looked like a tramp in comparison. I was showered, clean clothes, some make-up, but I lacked something. Something was missing. Was it my clothes? Is my make-up style not fitting with what I was wearing? Jeans, trainers and a hoodie can be an alright combo depending on the style of all three, but I was wearing my hubby-to-be’s grey furry jacket over the top of it all and a hat that looks like a tea cosy. Trust me, it wasn’t a good look. I looked like I had dressed in the dark in other people’s cast-offs. I have no style.
This problem also rings true with this blog. Recently I done a post about my friend Gemma and her blog which you can find here http://deathofaspinster.blogspot.co.uk/, and not long after I posted it, Gemma wanted a chit-chat. First off she called me a rascal for not telling her about the blog, and then suggested that I give myself a bit more credit and share it with more people. That’s all well and good, Gemma has a theme for her blog, I don’t. Random ramblings about stuff isn’t good enough. I’ve been all over the place with it and haven’t wanted to share it until I got something decent going on. Sure, I started it to practise my writing but it has got more attention than I ever dreamed so it’s needs an overhaul too.
Tonight I sat and had a think about what I needed to do. This isn’t just about style, it’s about identity. I done a post about that too a while back called “Howard Stern has Titties”, if you haven’t read it then you really should because what I am about to say will not make sense otherwise. Someone’s identity can be like a set of boobs, there are times they are awesome and other times they suck. Identity changes as our life changes, just like boobies. If my identity was a set of boobies, what I would be looking at is a saggy, sad looking former funbags with nipples that look like ear-plugs. That was not a pleasant picture I just painted but it’s true. I was busy with other things and my identity went down the toilet as a result. Now it’s time to reclaim it, stick it back together with some duct tape and glitter, and hope that no-one noticed that my identity and style were as rough as a badgers arse. By why stop there? I can change my appearance, my lifestyle, and my blog. I will still be me just with a nicer hair and no monobrow.
So the new format for the blog is-
Monday- Beauty post. I may as well keep everyone up to date with what I am using while I polish my style and buttocks.
Tuesday- Fitness and health. I’m getting fat……there will be pictures…..grab a bucket….it will be nasty!
Wednesday- Pet post. I have three dogs, two fish tanks, two kids….wait? It’s bad taste to include the kids in a pet post? Alright then…..
Thursday- Politics. It’s been my thing the last while so I’ll keep doing it.
Friday- Parenting post. Two kids, need I say more?
Saturday/Sunday- Weekend review of anything events, bars, outings etc. What? I’m not allowed to go out now?
I may change it in the future but for now this is the plan for now. I may be getting in there a bit late for a New Year overhaul but it’s never too late to want to change.