Once upon a time, when I was a single pringle, it wasn’t that easy to meet a man who shared my geeky interests. But, one day I met a man who is a bigger weirdo than me but only because he is nearly a foot taller. So gather round children, this is how I meet your father, I mean, my husband.
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Back in the day…
When I was at school, being a geek wasn’t cool like it is now. And in fairness, I wasn’t really a geek. I liked geeky stuff and saw Star Wars three times when it came out but if you asked the geeks of the school if I was one of them, they would laugh their legs off. You see, I was more of a goth with anger issues who would set you on fire. Although, I had plenty of geeky male friends, I never understood DnD (still don’t) or Warhammer. I still can’t navigate the lingo sometimes. I don’t know everything about the comic book world. And that is ok because my friends loved to explain a storyline to me, or help me navigate the nerd world when needed. As far as we were all concerned, we were a little geeky family who knew nothing about geek love dating and had no interest in exploring that world. My experience is a far cry from what a lot of girls face in the nerd world, and I am truly blessed that my brothers-of-nerd didn’t create a toxic environment just because I was a girl.
Growing up
By the time I had hit my twenties, my responsibilities had chipped away at my geeky side. Besides, dating for nerds wasn’t really a thing back then. What guy wanted to go to the cinema to watch Star Wars (three times)? And who wanted to poke through a comic book shop on a Saturday afternoon when you could be getting a pub lunch with the football on in the background? Ok, admittedly, I love football too so heading to the pub wasn’t a bad thing. It was the erasure of the geeky part of me that happened so slowly that I didn’t realise it until it was almost too late. I think I was about 25 or 26 when I really started to lean into who I am and what I like, and made the decision to stay true to that part. One of the hardest things was trying to defend my hobbies and interests to people I had nothing in common with. These people believed that comics were for children while having no discernible interests other than punishing their liver every weekend.
Meeting the One
There comes a time in your life when you have to ask yourself, “what way do I like my eggs?” and the answer is not fertilized in the morning. Where am I getting this thought from? Simple, the movie Runaway Bride. My mum is a massive Julia Roberts fan (and by extension, so am I) and I’ve seen the movie about a hundred times. There are several running themes *ba dum tish!* in the movie, and one of them is the subject of eggs and how her preference for eggs changes with every relationship because she tries to mimic the likes of her respective groom-to-be. Why am I going on about a movie that is over 20 years old? Easy. We all need to know what type of eggs we like; and know who we really are. It is only when we know who we are that we can find the right person for us. I started digging deep and discovered a lot about myself. I like comic books, Tim Burton is my favorite director, Buffy the Vampire Slayer is one of my favourite TV shows, and I like the darker side of nerd life. So when I meet the man who would become my husband, I didn’t feel the need to hide the geeky side of me. In fact, we both fully embraced the geek life together.
Happily Ever After
I’ve been with my husband for nearly a decade and we enjoy a healthy geek filled relationship. We introduce each other to different things and ideas. I got him interested in Breaking Bad and Arrow when we started going out. When the Justice League was in the cinema, we were first in line. When I started this blog and wanted a movie section, we sat together and watched every Marvel movie to see what order they should go in. Every Christmas and birthday, we know exactly what to get each other. This year, my hubby received the complete Dragon Ball Z book collection. For my birthday, I was treated to a Horror movie collection starring Boris Karloff. If I see a Superman product, and I mean literally ANYTHING Superman, I know I can get it and it will be appreciated. We even went as far as having a Superman cake topper on our wedding cake.
Growing Old
Over the years, people have asked when we will ditch the geek stuff. My answer is never! Over the years we have discovered so many interests and new areas of the geek fandom together, interests that have helped us through the dark times and the good. Why should we give all of this up because someone we know doesn’t like it? That’s not how life works. My interests are not your interests, and that is ok. There are things that my husband likes that I don’t, and that’s ok too. The thing is, we will never shame each other for the things we love. As we get older, we will continue to explore the nerd world. We will get dressed up for Comic-Con, and snuggle up for a movie marathon in our DC PJs. I’ll buy cookbooks that claim to have the recipes for the food in his computer games, and he’ll make jokes about taking an arrow to the knee while he eats a sweetroll. We have a whole life together and we plan on nerding it out together.